That may sound a little dramatic, dear internet, but when you find yourself logging on at every available moment for no other reason than to tend to a bunch of pixelated monsters in a FaceBook application… well then.
I’ve never really been a big one for FB games. Yes, I had a Fairy Garden for a while, but as anyone who ever popped by to check it out would tell you, my plants spent more time withered, brown and crunchy than they did flourishing.
Thing is, I had very very limited access to FB (read: practically nonexistant). So things died. That’s just the way it was. And as much as I lamented the fact, short of relying on the thousands of faceless people out hunting for snails and the like, I couldn’t guarantee that others would take care of my poor neglected garden. I think even my fairy eventually gave up and turned to crack and prostitution.
But now that I have internet access at home (and indeed wherever I want it), well I’ve rediscovered the world of applications.
Fairy garden long dead, I’ve instead turned my attention to games like Treasure Isle and Backyard Monsters. Gone are the days of boring static games. Now everything moves and has a catchy (read: inanely annoying) little tune on a far too short loop.
Treasure Isle is a bit irritating seeing as how I’ve been stuck on the same dratted island for the past two days all because I don’t have the stupid purple gem I need to get through the gate to dig up the rest of it. So until someone is kind enough to send me one (hint hint hint) I’ll be stuck tending to my pineapple crops on my home island.
The monsters on the other hand, are awesome. You’re given two weeks to get set up before outsiders start attacking you. So I’ve spent the last 4 days building town halls, shops and factories and I’m slowly starting to breed my little monster army.
Sure, there’s a certain order things need to be done in, and you’ve got to decide tactically which critters you need when it comes time to fight – but really, it’s easy so far.
Yes, internet, this is what my life has come to.
That, and watching whatever bizarre psycadelic trip it is that’s showing on CTV at the moment. Singing dancing hindu deities, car alarms, a woman crying alone in bed and other things which don’t seem to really fit.
Then again, this is what you get for watching telly way after midnight. Although, honestly, it’s better than the soft focus smut eTV used to screen.